Becky Homecky Volume 3 How to Dress for Court

Now this is at the forefront of my mind because I have to go down to the Family Justice Center at 10:30 this morning. Yes, HE* was found guilty of contempt in November and we all have to go back to make sure he made his first payment. I know, it makes no sense, they should have put it out 3 months or so, but he was raked over the coals by the judge and she wanted to be sure he was following the order this time or he's going to go to the WORKHOUSE..ie, JAIL.
Last November was a painful month. I HATE going to court, I HATE giving that man the time of day and I HATE even more that he uses Jack to try to make him look good. I royally screwed up and I pay the price of that mistake every day. It took 5 years for the court system to finally hold him responsible but they finally did, and for that, I am very grateful.

But, I digress...

Rule #1: If you are the one on trial for contempt for non payment of child support, DO NOT show up to court wearing a black designer suit and expensive shoes. I would suggest something that makes you look like a working class guy who is down on his luck.

Duhhhhh, and you ask "what in God's name was he thinking?" We haven't figured that out, and we gave up trying years ago.

Rule #2: If you are the person who is supposed to be receiving the child support, dress down...go for dowdy, and make sure anyone who goes along for moral support does the same thing. I suggest jeans, and the pair that makes you look the worst, the ones you hardly ever wear because they make your butt look flat. Make sure you wear that one sweater you have that you can't get rid of because Great Aunt Martha knit it and now is in the great Yarn Store in the sky, but you never wear it because the color makes you look like you are just on the verge of yakking up your Fruity Pebbles. For your hair, go for the pony tail, and not very neat. I suggest, maybe, day three from the last wash. This is not the time to impress the judge on how great you can look when you really put the effort into it. You are wearing the pain of not receiving your court ordered child support, medical insurance premiums, day care costs, attorney fees, and the laundry list of things he was supposed to give you back but never did because he gave all your stuff away so you couldn't have it. Remember, by the time you actually get to court, we are talking about 10's of thousands of dollars, so let's not dress to impress, ok?

Later...


Ok, so all of this is in good fun, because we know that it really had nothing to do with what I was wearing, but the fact that he came across as a complete ass munch that was trying to get out of paying child support. As it turns out, today was not much different. He said he never got the Motions we filed, even though they were mailed to his house. He didn't want to pay the extra 35 dollars a month to help with day care in the summer because HE doesn't use it (which is a total lie, Jack WANTS and DOES to go all five days), and he told the judge he didn't believe I maintained health insurance, even though he has used it when Jack was with him. Sigh. He also said that he didn't want to pay for half of Jack's kindergarten tuition because he was going to get the church to pay for his portion. Well, um, yeah, they wouldn't let him come back if the bill wasn't paid. Another, SIGH.

I told myself I was not ever going to talk about this situation, but I am breaking my own rule because I want to make one thing perfectly clear: what I really want is for him to get a normal job, pay his obligations to me and everyone else and be a decent human being. Lying in court and trying to get other people to pay your debts is STEALING and really, really bad karma. My son deserves to have a father he can be proud of, and that's what I really want for Christmas, Santa.

On a lighter note, Jack and I had a fabulous time at the mall on Monday. I was supposed to meet my friend Jan for coffee, but we missed each other because we were at opposite Starbucks. Oops. I don't call it Hugedale for nothing.

I did get another pair of my favorite JEANS, and I bought three sweaters on clearance ($7.49, $9.99 and $11.99, woo-hoo!) since I finally retired my furs and Todd did a little happy dance to that since he HATED them. If you missed them at Christmas, you can find pictures of them HERE and HERE.

Jack won a stuffed dog at Camp Snoopy and he got a diamond shaped crystal that he SWEARS will be used to fight the powers of evil on the school bus. I know, it makes no sense to me, either.

This weekend, we have both the boys, and Jack is having a sleepover with his best friend Luke. So my weekend will be filled with LEGOS and video games and made up games I can't follow, and boys running all over the house with walkie talkies.

And I wouldn't have it any other way.



*if you don't know who I'm talking about...email me and I'll fill you in.